Identifying Bubba *****SATURDAY WARNING*****
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Thread: Identifying Bubba *****SATURDAY WARNING*****

  1. #1
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    Identifying Bubba *****SATURDAY WARNING*****

    Bubba died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly. The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Darryl and Gary.

    The three men had always done everything together!!!!!

    Darryl arrived first and when the mortician pulled back the sheet Darryl said, “Yup, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll him over.”

    The mortician rolled him over, and Darryl said, “Nope, ain’t Bubba.”

    The mortician thought this was rather strange. Then he brought Gary in to identify the body.

    Gary looked at the body and said, “Yup he’s pretty well burnt up. Roll him over.” The mortician rolled him over and Gary said, “No, it ain’t Bubba.”

    The mortician asked, “How can you tell?”

    Gary said, “Well, Bubba had two assholes.”

    “What? He had two assholes?” asked the mortician.

    Yup, I’ve never seen ‘em, but everyone knew he had two assholes. Every time we went to town, folks would say, “Here comes Bubba with them two assholes!”


    HI-OHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
    10Gauge, burnnrbr, TRAAK's and 5 others like this.
    When you're the Big Dog, the fleas want to take you down. Fact of life.
    Everyone's beautiful on the inside, until I'm through with them.

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    Ah, poetry at its best. How about this one. Not as blunt but with the same meaning, sort of.

    Who would himself with shadows entertain,
    Or gild his life with lights that shine in vain,
    Or nurse false hopes that do but cheat the true?--
    Though with my dream my heaven should be resigned--
    Though the free-pinioned soul that once could dwell
    In the large empire of the possible,
    This workday life with iron chains may bind,
    Yet thus the mastery o'er ourselves we find,
    And solemn duty to our acts decreed,
    Meets us thus tutored in the hour of need,
    With a more sober and submissive mind!
    How front necessity--yet bid thy youth
    Shun the mild rule of life's calm sovereign, truth."

    So speakest thou, friend, how stronger far than I;
    As from experience--that sure port serene--
    Thou lookest;--and straight, a coldness wraps the sky,
    The summer glory withers from the scene,
    Scared by the solemn spell; behold them fly,
    The godlike images that seemed so fair!
    Silent the playful Muse--the rosy hours
    Halt in their dance; and the May-breathing flowers
    Fall from the sister-graces' waving hair.
    Sweet-mouthed Apollo breaks his golden lyre,
    Hermes, the wand with many a marvel rife;--
    The veil, rose-woven, by the young desire
    With dreams, drops from the hueless cheeks of life.
    The world seems what it is--a grave! and love
    Casts down the bondage wound his eyes above,
    And sees!--He sees but images of clay
    Where he dreamed gods; and sighs--and glides away.
    The youngness of the beautiful grows old,
    And on thy lips the bride's sweet kiss seems cold;
    And in the crowd of joys--upon thy throne
    Thou sittest in state, and hardenest into stone.

  3. #3
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    Walleye likes this.
    pics / vid required for validation

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  5. #4
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    Lol! Thould be there goes Bubba with his 2 dumb shits!
    The shortest distance between 2 "points" is a straight line.

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    Got a good laugh out of that. Thanks.

  7. #6
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    Poor Bubba...

  8. #7
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    Guess who earned a starring role next week? I had a special one saved for misc, but the poet gets the nod. <evilgrin>
    When you're the Big Dog, the fleas want to take you down. Fact of life.
    Everyone's beautiful on the inside, until I'm through with them.

  9. #8
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    Just got sent to the back of the "Online Line". Never had this happen. Don't get me wrong Sniper48 I ain't complaining but it better be good.
    sniper48 likes this.
    "I have been persecuted but never prosecuted." Antony C. Sutton regarding his books. It's mildly amusing to see "Groupthink".

  10. #9
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    Winner Big Time......Big Time.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!............One of the best my friend !
    sniper48 likes this.
    "The enemy will never see the backs of my Texans" - Gen. Robert E. Lee CSA

 

 

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